[00:12.68]My mind's a kaleidoscope, it thinks too fast[00:14.27]Blurs all the colors 'til I can't see past[00:15.81]The last mistake, the choice I made[00:17.35]Staring in the mirror with myself to blame[00:18.87]Sometimes I'm afraid of the thoughts inside[00:20.11]Nowhere to hide inside my mind[00:21.80]I'm scared that you'll compare and[00:23.31]I'll look a lifetime past repair[00:24.90]I second guess myself to death,[00:26.44]I re-solicit every step[00:28.00]What if my words are meaningless?[00:29.50]What if my heart's misleading this?[00:30.99]I try to capture every moment as it comes to me[00:33.63]Bottle up the memories and let them keep me company[00:42.09]When the hope of morning starts to fade in me[00:48.12]I don't dare let darkness have its way with me[00:54.19]And the hope of morning makes me worth the fight[01:00.98]I will not be giving in tonight[01:08.64]When I'm old and grey, or thirty,[01:10.13]or whatever happens first,[01:11.73]I'll need you to reassure me I didn't waste a verse[01:15.02]Or worse, what if my life's work is reduced to just myself[01:17.95]Like never let you get a word in,[01:19.09]while I dissect my mental health[01:21.08]Or lack thereof, whatever, there's too many things to track[01:24.18]I really can't remember if I'm insane or insomniac[01:26.86]Now days, all the kids want crazy, wanna diagnose themselves[01:29.96]Trade up made up epidemics,[01:31.41]pass around prescription pills[01:32.86]But my disorder can't be cured[01:34.65]by a bottle, blade, or dose[01:35.99]Self-disgust and selfishness tend to hold me awfully close[01:39.19]But I don't wanna let you see that,[01:40.78]I don't want my friends to know[01:42.17]Self-disgust and selfishness take me everywhere I go[01:44.96]When the hope of morning starts to fade in me[01:50.69]I don't dare let darkness have its way with me[01:56.72]And the hope of morning makes me worth the fight[02:03.54]I will not be giving in tonight[02:10.12]Try as I might to keep it together[02:12.71]Why is recovery taking forever[02:15.74]Fool the whole world, just until I get better[02:18.83]I'm terrified I'll be faking forever[02:23.46]On and on I wonder what went wrong inside my head[02:26.05]I don't have to have the answers, but tonight I wish I did[02:29.39]All the pain I can't explain away won't fade[02:32.57]All the secrets silenced by the shame[02:34.67]Don't make me say it[02:42.60]Don't make me say it[02:47.17]When the hope of morning starts to fade in me[02:53.34]I don't dare let darkness have its way with me[02:59.47]And the hope of morning makes me worth the fight[03:06.25]I will not be giving in tonight